Fuck you, faggot.
Fuck you, faggot.
Shouldn't you be out fucking a maple leaf or something? -crlygrl
If you've seen the Comedy Central Showdown, you'd see they all have a joke of theirs next to their name. Here is Kyle's:
Kyle Cease
"You ever go into a restaurant -- whether you want a Coke or a Pepsi, they always have the other one?"
In the spirit of positivity, I will say that joke positively sucks balls.
He tried soooo hard not to say "didja ever notice?" though!
He stole that bit from Tim Heidecker.Originally Posted by Mack Luster
This gives me an idea for a sketch where a heckler interrupts a guy's act by explaining the reasoning behind a bunch of toothless "didja ever notice?" things like that.
"Well the reason for that, Kyle, is that Pepsi and Coke distributors have different routes and try to get different dining establishments to sign exclusive contracts wherein they only serve that company's products. That's why sometimes you'll ask for a specific beverage the server will say "Oh I'm sorry, we only serve Pepsi products." or, obviously the reverse if the product you requested is distributed by Coke. Of course I'm fond of Dr. Pepper and they are actually self-distributed and in direct competition with both Pepsi and Coke, which opens up a whole other issue for me personally! But listen to me blather on about the intricacies of soft-drink placement in restaurants, I'm sorry, you were doing some very funny observational things. Go ahead, sorry to interrupt!"
Awesome! (insert coffee spit-take here)
nevermind, didn't read ahead.
This really should have been a clip of a bridge on fire.
if only i had that capability to actually do something like that, maybe then i would make threats to people who actually deserved it. Until then, it's just not the case.
Watch my video again!! I promise its even better now.
Last edited by KevinCease; December 21, 2009 at 2:19 AM.
That video was not what I was expecting. I imagined 20 exhausted comedians sleeping in cots being woken up by Kyle Cease at 4AM with a vaudevillian seltzer bottle.
I have the capability!
[YOUTUBE]YuxZKwaxR7g[/YOUTUBE]
I have to say seriously that the seltzer bottle comment was the funniest thing I have ever heard. I am very very serious. I have been laughing at that visual for the last 20 minutes.
Hi Kyle! What are you doing tomorrow?
Last edited by KevinCease; December 21, 2009 at 2:27 AM.
fast, in-your-face, angry, get-the-fuck-outta-here clap.
"Even gutter hags trump pretty boys." - BabyCakes
hey ASR post some jpeg's of the time you called Paula Poundstone out on myspace. that was classic
"Drop down and give me 50 "didja ever notices" maggots! You love observational humor, don't you Private? You wanna put observational humor in a dress and take it to the Motel 6 and give it tender kisses, don't you?"
I am wondering really, who is on this forum, are you all comics? Paid? Headliners? Openers? Because we are doing this thing called Stand-Up bootcamp, and it will give you the opportunity to sit down for 2 full 8-10 hour days days (out of the 5) to actually be coached one-on one on your material by 6-8 different headliners, at about 2-4 hrs each person, (or more, its up to you). You can develop a real relationship with these people. Oh, and you will get booked in many places. also, you will become funny. Oh, and you will talk to allot of people and become motivated to make allot of money. Just thought you would like to know, maybe you will start to actually feel good about stand up. When that happens, you will suddenly be focused on your own career and life. It's really a good feeling. If you get involved and start becoming more positive to other people, by the time you hit 18 you will be really good and easily respected in the industry, because you will have had soo much time learning and working on all of this.
Last edited by KevinCease; December 21, 2009 at 3:28 PM.
Fuck you, faggot.
"(inaudible) I've seen, basically, all of those at this point."
(laughter)
"Yes, but have you ever seen Threen Wolf?"
~ AST Wake Up podcast 07/25/09, the Technology episode
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